Monday, October 13, 2008

A question posted in an online study....

Meditate on the title "Most High." What does it mean to you? How do you or will you incorporate it in your worship?

To me, the title Most High means that God is above all--above all governments, all the planets, all the stars, all that we as humans know and can even begin to perceive. It amazes me to think that at the same time that God is the Most High, he is also totally attainable by us! He is High but He has made himself humble for us. He has done this even though He would NEVER have to, but because He desires a relationship with us! Isn't that just awe-inspiring??

I need to certainly put Him above my own selfish needs and desires since He IS the Most High. Since He has humbled himself, how much more I need to show Him my love, allegiance, and appreciation by worshiping Him in ALL I do and say and even think! My life should be a constant act of worship and praise!

Saturday, October 11, 2008

Please lift me up in prayers!

I haven't shared on here about the irritating and debilitating rash I have been dealing for months. If you want/need to know more, please leave it in comments or email me. The important part is that I covet your prayers! Yesterday, I found out that nothing had showed up as an allergen in skin tests. I could have cried in front of the doctor, I was so torn up. I came home and cried and cried and cried. My eyes were still swollen when I got up this morning, and I had stopped crying hours before I went to sleep.

I had my pity party last night, complete with panic attack on the way to Chris' Mamaw's house, where I made him bring me back home. I just could not face trying to converse and act like everything was okay when it WASN'T. I would have upset Mamaw, too, and I hated to do that. So I stayed here, watched Miss Congeniality and worked through some work-related emails, and fell asleep early. I know that Chris was worried about me. In 10 years of marriage, he had never seen me in such a state.

To answer some questions, this is not a hivey rash, it is more of a flat, dotty rash. I have been fighting this since mid-July. I have been told it was shingles (and took a round of Valtrex, I might add), taken one shot of steroids, taken two rounds of oral steroids, had a skin biopsy, been told I was allergic to Prilosec and then also all other class of acid blockers as well. ALL to come back to the fact I broke out AGAIN. It has been very trying, especially as I deal with my husband, almost 5 year old and 7 year old, church issues, starting back to full time first grade teaching, starting into a graduate program, and dealing with issues at work. So do ya see why I was pretty down last night??

But after some alone time and some intense prayer (read: begging the Lord), I feel much better today. I have put my big girl panties on and am dealing with it. Not that I'm not still discouraged, but I'm claiming healing in Jesus' name. I am asking everyone that I know to pray, and if I flare up again, I'm going to ask my dad to pray a prayer of healing over me. This is quite bold for a United Methodist born and bred girl to say all this, cause it just isn't usually our way, but I know that the Lord has Power over all, and I know He doesn't want me to suffer. If I have to start coming off my medications, then suffer it will be. I really fear for my mental health if it comes to that.

Will you please join me in this? Will you please pray that the Lord will take this rash from me, and that it will never flare again? I would so appreciate it, and will sing His praises when it happens!

You may read these same words on my other blog and if you frequent the same sites I do, may see it there too. Please forgive me for not restating this at every site. I thank you for your prayers again, and know that Jesus will be the conqueror in this!!

Wednesday, October 8, 2008

A line from a song that I want to remember....

"Jesus, I'm empty without you
And you're everything I need
Come with your grace
Come fill a space in me."

Thursday, October 2, 2008

I AM study: Lesson Eleven

1. When is the last time you encountered a Fist Shaker? This may be a stranger to you or as close as a loved one in your own home. Does anything in our description help you to understand their animosity towards God? Are you able to have more compassion towards them?

Yes, I work with one. Any time anyone tries to discuss the Lord with him, he just turns off his usually very kind heart. I do have compassion toward him and pray for him to come to know the Lord, and for the Lord to melt the ice that has formed around his heart.

2. Does anything about Rahab's redemption strike a nerve? This may be a question you would like to ponder privately. Sexual sin and/or victimization can be an area where Satan has an enormous stronghold because it can hold so many painful and shameful memories. If Rahab teaches us anything, please know God can redeem any life and any situation, no matter how heinous it seems, and plant you unashamedly 'in the midst of Israel'. Rahab deserved death according to Mosaic Law, however she was shown nothing but lovingkindness by the God and nation of Israel.

I've long said that Rahab is the woman in the Bible that I can most relate to. I do not share specific similarities, but I do share the feeling that though I have made some not so great decisions in my life, the Lord forgives me and I can still be used for the good of His kingdom!

3. Is there an area of your life in which you feel you have come full circle? Where you've come to a place where everything and nothing are the same? (I'm thinking Lord of the Rings when Frodo goes back to the Shire after his long adventure. You have no clue what I just said if you are not an LOTR nerd so just ignore this if it doesn't make sense! :)

Ummm, not really..but I might as I ponder it! If I do, I'll be back to edit!

4. When you were born again, did you gain a new appreciation for your surroundings as Rahab did when she received the Promise along with the Promised Land? Has some old place, object, or relationship been redeemed by now serving a 'high and holy purpose'?

Yes, in a way. I can see the good in relationships, and why people were in my life when they were!

5. Believers can still be Fist Shakers. Do you have circumstances in your life in which you find yourself shaking your fist at God? Something He has asked you to endure, asked you to do, seemingly taken away from you? Can you see how shaking your fist is keeping you from your Promise? (I'm not talking eternal security here - Only abundant living.)

I've been guilty over the past few months of shaking my fist. This rash has really become trying to me. It is very hard to be a patient and calm teacher when all I feel like doing is laying down on an icepack or scratching the skin off my body. I pray that we are coming closer to a resolution to this, and have been asking friends for prayer that this is the case!